{"id":2377,"date":"2023-01-19T20:01:42","date_gmt":"2023-01-19T20:01:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/niemanstoryboard.org\/2023\/01\/19\/profile-character-interviews-privacy-transparency-ethics\/"},"modified":"2024-10-21T16:40:11","modified_gmt":"2024-10-21T16:40:11","slug":"profile-character-interviews-privacy-transparency-ethics","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/niemanstoryboard.org\/2023\/01\/19\/profile-character-interviews-privacy-transparency-ethics\/","title":{"rendered":"A profile of a single mom trying to raise a “good man” balances transparency and privacy"},"content":{"rendered":" \n
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When Jose A. Del Real was on the lookout for people navigating the snarled thicket of American masculinity, he found an unexpected one: a 23-year-old waitress and single mom in northeast Wyoming. He was in the nation\u2019s least-populated state reporting for the Washington Post series \u201cMasculinity in America\u201d when he met Sarah, who had her own thoughtful and fraught experience with the issue.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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\u201cWe started chatting and she told me she\u2019d like to read a story that reflects how hard it is to raise young boys today, especially for single moms,\u201d Del Real said.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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Jose A. Del Real<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n<\/div> \n
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Del Real<\/a> is skilled at reporting and writing about capital-I \u201cIssues\u201d in ways that steer clear of abstraction \u2014 just see the Storyboard annotation on his 2021 story about a family riven by politics<\/a>. So he didn\u2019t dismiss Sarah\u2019s comments. Instead, he used them as a clue, a guidepost and a treasure map for \u201cA Mother\u2019s Charge<\/a>,\u201d<\/strong> a nuanced profile about Sarah\u2019s struggle to raise a 5-year-old boy in a world that bristles with traps.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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Still, it took much more than Sarah\u2019s comments to summon the story into existence: There were hours of interviews and detail-gathering; a sensitive approach to make sure Sarah understood what participation in the story meant; considerations that balanced reader transparency with privacy for Sarah and her son, and writing that unspooled in what Del Real describes as a \u201cbraided\u201d narrative.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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\u201cWe consulted with Sarah along the way and laid out our thinking. It was important that she have space to voice any concerns,\u201d Del Real said.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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Other posts featuring Jose Del Real<\/h2>\n\n
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Inside America\u2019s political divide<\/a><\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n\t\n<\/div> \n

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The story and its powerful photos by Jabin Botsford<\/a> was published as part of the Post\u2019s series exploring the male image in American culture. It fits snugly with Del Real\u2019s pieces about a prevention specialist<\/a> tackling toxic masculinity,  a bull-riding cowboy<\/a> and a blue-collar husband and father who wore women\u2019s clothes. But Sarah\u2019s story also stands on its own \u2014 a vivid profile of a women trying to raise her warm, curious boy into a good man.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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\u201cI was seeing a lot of commentary about the state of masculinity in America, but very few reported narratives about how people navigate these conflicts in their day-to-day lives,\u201d he told me. Real answered questions about the overall series and his reporting\/writing approach, then worked with Storyboard to annotate his story. His responses have been lightly edited for length and clarity.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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<\/strong>This story falls under the category of \u201cMasculinity in America\u201d in the Post. How did the idea explore that topic come about?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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It struck me a few months into 2022 that I was seeing a lot of commentary about the state of masculinity in America, but very few reported narratives about how people navigate these conflicts in their day-to-day lives. Male grievance, entitlement and drift are at the core of many of our culture wars today. But for whatever reason, journalists often write about gender without writing about men themselves. I thought it would be valuable to try to tell some stories about how men decide what kind of people they want to be and the cues they get from the broader culture about what a \u201creal man\u201d is. It\u2019s the sort of topic that\u2019s particularly suited to a narrative approach because it\u2019s so complicated and so individualistic, yet it adds up to something big and structural. The first story in the series was about Bill Hawley, a county public health official<\/a> who spends all his time trying to get cowboys and military veterans to talk about their feelings. He is a suicide attempt survivor himself and had thought deeply about male despair. After that, I was drawn back to Wyoming, the Cowboy State, as a setting for several more of these stories. This brought some much-needed geographic discipline to a very broad topic. Next year I\u2019ll probably keep writing about this topic but expand the geographic scope.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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What\u2019s been the reaction from readers and from Sarah?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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I don\u2019t think I\u2019ve ever had so many people write to me after a story \u2014 and I used to cover Trump! I must have received hundreds of direct emails about it. Before publishing, I went through the story with Sarah, section by section, so that she would know what was in it before it showed up online. I didn\u2019t share a draft, of course, but I wanted her to know how it would read ahead of time. She was overcome with emotion and said she was glad someone was writing about working class women and how they navigate these dynamics around male violence and entitlement.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n\n\n \n

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We have not been in touch since. Her life is chaotic and I\u2019m not a priority, which I understand. Her grandmother and I have corresponded quite a bit though. She said she admired the story but her one critical note was that she thinks Sarah will raise her son to be a good man, which is not a foregone conclusion in the piece I wrote. I do hope that\u2019s true.<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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Here are a few craft gems from Del Real\u2019s comments in the annotation:<\/p>\n\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n

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